#Lore24 – Entry #236 – Helica Month #24 – The Lost Years

Excerpt from the Journals of Azita Gaji, Explorer of Helica, Seeker of Knowledge, Blessed of Saghirah

One cannot appreciate the simple things in life, such as feeling the sun upon your skin, or the act of writing in one’s journal, until one has been forced to live as a Beast under the control of the Church of Phyresis.  I thought certainly that I was to be sentenced to death when I was captured along the banks of the Rusting River, but I was granted a “merciful” punishment by Tephysea and enslaved with the others who have displeased the Church, even with the truths I knew.

I did learn something of the process of creating a Beast when the sentence was carried out, and that the Order of the Tamers has a completely different meaning than the one that is commonly known, for it is they who are responsible for developing the process, and it is a special sect within their ranks that oversee its application.  I was placed within the lowest ranks of Beasts, the Servant Breed, my magical arts sealed away, and my leash extremely short. 

As a Beast, I would be made to serve my accuser, Tephysea, exclusively.  I would learn that she possessed a nature even more sadistic than what I had only guessed at before, and every little infraction was punished with pain that often times left me unable to move for several hours.  Though the rubbery flesh of a Beast is resilient to the elements and in the case of the hardier breeds, physical damage, it seemed that mine only amplified the agony I experienced.  Even more insidiously, all the while I was trapped within the new flesh, I was subjected to a constant psychic nudging to obey, serve, and worship the One True God, almost as if its very voice were in my head.  I do not yet know if this was a special punishment for me, or if all Beasts must suffer like this until they willingly accept the commands and do as they are told.  I am not sure if my mental fortitude was a blessing or a curse in all honesty.

I won’t further detail my time as a Beast, for I wish to forget as much of it as I can.  As Tephysea’s slave, I would learn disappointingly little, for I was hardly more than a pet for her to amuse herself with and was kept far away from her machinations.  The outside world may well not have existed for me, for my world revolved around her and her alone, and when I was not caged, I was being tortured behind closed doors. 

It is indeed a sad state that one finds themselves in when the awakening of the Transgressor is seen as a blessing, though this has led to another somewhat unsettling train of thought regarding the Beasts’ existence.  I am curious as to whether the Beasts are somehow magically preserved by their enforced state, for none who knew of my fate seemed surprised by the fact that I lived as long as I did without seemingly succumbing to old age or frailty. 

For, you see, it had been just over sixty years since I was made a Beast, and only the timely arrival of the Transgressor would see me freed of my sentence.  This time, when it came, the Wicked One came to Tyraguard itself and announced its presence by attacking the most holy of cities on Helica.  Tephysea was, conveniently enough, away from the city on one of my few reprieves from her cruelty.  Thinking back on the timing of her absences, I have come to realize what it was she was doing but will not discuss it here.

I am not certain how I survived the blast which destroyed the residences I had been secured within, but suffice to say I awoke sometime later, naked and bleeding on the newly expanded waterfront Tyraguard had gained, the Beast’s magical bond to me apparently broken by the Transgressor’s attack.  With the Sylvanae presence at a minimum given the timing of Tephysea’s absence, I was not recognized by the human priests who found me and took me to one of the treatment stations to tend my wounds, and no signs of my Beast flesh remained to clue them in, its magical anchors, the collar and shackles, melted away.

I wasted no time when I could finally move and hastily fled the city, blending in amongst the refugees bound south for San Granalle.  Though my mind and spirit were unsettled at the time, I would nonetheless plan to resume my journey once I had sufficiently recovered my senses, and I would pick up where I left off in this strange yet familiar world.  I feel it will be some time before my mind is at any kind of ease on my task.  I can still hear the voice of the One True God echoing in my head even though the influence of the Beast’s shell is gone, and I still suffer a keen paranoia and sensitivity to sensations that could only have come from my torture at the hands of the wood elf.  I was never one for vengeance, but it seems I may be developing a taste for it.